About John Sundholm

John Sundholm is a writer, video producer and performer originally from Michigan, and is one of those people who says he "lived in London for a while" even though it was only six weeks for study abroad. He made Ellen DeGeneres laugh once so you should probably follow him on Instagram, Twitter and Medium, where he does a lot of yelling under the name @JohntheCraptist.

Articles by John Sundholm

Celebri-Tea

Jimmy Kimmel Threw Megan Rapinoe and Alex Morgan The Most Trumpian Victory Party Since They Weren’t Going to the White House

You may have heard that the US Women’s National Soccer Team are a bunch of badasses who absolutely crushed the FIFA Women’s World Cup this year! And as such, they were set to receive a probable invite to the White House—until team captain and all-around badass Megan Rapinoe emphatically declared: “I’m not going to the … Continued

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Celebri-Tea

Someone Spotted A Steak At The Grocery Store That Looks Just Like Vladimir Putin, And We Can’t Stop Staring

Russian President Vladimir Putin is absolutely everywhere nowadays. Seems like every time you turn around there’s a new story about Putin doing or saying something crazy, or a new eyebrow-raising allegation about our dear President being in league with the guy, and it’s frankly a bit overwhelming. But this? Well this is entirely too much. … Continued

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The Scoop

Someone Just Noticed A Very Adult Situation Happening At The Airport Depicted In Their Kid’s Picture Book

While childhood is meant to be a time of multi-colored wonder, eventually every child must learn about the more difficult, less happy parts of life. But doesn’t finding an actual drug bust in the details of a picture books seem a little over the top‽‽ Not if you’re the author of a certain children’s book. … Continued

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Celebri-Tea

Jeremy Renner Just Released A Song—And The Title Is Understandably Confusing The Internet

Jeremy Renner is many things—an Avenger, an action star, an Oscar nominee—but would you ever guess he was also a singer and musician? Renner is a singer-songwriter, guitarist, keyboardist and drummer. Before his acting career took off, he was in the group Sons of Ben. He performed on the soundtracks for North Country, Love Comes … Continued

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#same

People Are Hilariously Photoshopping Ivanka Trump Into All Sorts Of Places Where She Isn’t Wanted

Did you happen to see Ivanka Trump’s latest facepalm of an attempt at political posturing? In case you missed it, Ivanka, for reasons nobody understands, was at the G20 summit in Japan where she inserted herself into a conversation between Theresa May, International Monetary Fund director Christine Lagarde, French President Emmanuel Macron and Canadian Prime … Continued

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The Scoop

Bishop’s Plan To ‘Get Rid Of The Devil’ From His City Is Extreme To Say The Least

When solving big, intractable problems, it’s important to have an open mind and a sense of creativity. One person’s bonkers is another person’s innovation, you know? Corn flakes were invented to cure masturbation, for heaven’s sake, and look at them now. Which is why we want you to take seriously Colombian Monsignor Rubén Darío Jaramillo … Continued

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The Scoop

The Memes Of Beto O’Rourke And Cory Booker Breaking Out Their Spanish Skills At The Debate Are En Fuego

And so it begins. Last night in Miami, the first half of the Democratic candidates for President faced off in the very first debate of the 2020 election. And it was good! Constructive, mostly amicable, full of ideas none of which involved imprisoning four-year-olds without access to even a toothbrush, which incidentally even the Taliban … Continued

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Celebri-Tea

If You Played The ‘Mystery Date’ Board Game From The Early 2000s, You Probably ‘Dated’ Chris Evans

Good news everyone! The truth you’ve always held in your heart—that Best Hollywood Chris, Chris Evans, is secretly in love with you—is now an actual truth outside your heart. Probably. On a technicality. So, remember the board game “Mystery Date”? If not, jog your memory with this hilariously dumb commercial from 2002 with a jingle … Continued

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Celebri-Tea

Someone Tweeted That ‘Ed Sheeran Got Hot,’ And The Internet Took It And Ran

There are so many adjectives to describe Ed Sheeran. Surely many would go with “genius.” His albums, after all, have a tendency to shatter records left and right in several different parts of the world. “Accomplished” could be another—the guy’s list of awards and accolades is reeeeeally long, especially when weighed against the relatively short … Continued

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The Scoop

Indiana Man Tries To Kidnap 6-Year-Old Girl From Her Grandparents’ Apartment—And They Make Him Instantly Regret It

Let this be a lesson to you all: drugs are bad. Because they can make you do crazy things. Things like break down the door to a random apartment and try to kidnap a random child you’re convinced is yours.  But in fact is just a random child who’s never seen you in its life. … Continued

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#same

You Know That ‘Friendship Tree’ Trump And Macron Planted Together? Yeah, She Dead.

LOL, Oops… In what simply must be the most hilariously symbolic thing to ever happen in the history of human existence, the “Friendship Tree” our Glorious Leader—President Donald Trump—and French President Emmanuel Macron planted is now just a pile of dead sticks being run through the wood chipper of time. Trump and Macron planted a … Continued

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Celebri-Tea

Hugh Grant Opens Up About The Reasons He Won’t Do Rom-Coms Anymore

When it comes to rom-coms, there’s a handful of undisputed queens of the genre–Julia Roberts and Meg Ryan are usually the first names to come to mind. But when it comes to kings? Well, there’s really only one guy who fits the bill: Hugh Grant. From his breakout in Four Weddings and a Funeral to iconic films … Continued

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