We’re really big fans of Scooby-Doo around here. If you’re not, maybe you don’t know that music plays a huge role in the show. There is a band called the Hex Girls, comprising three “wiccan witches.” The band has seen various incarnations through the show, but they’ve got a few songs that are honestly total jams. There’s “I’m A Hex Girl.” Daphne joined the band once and sang a song called “Trap of Love.” Their big hit is a song about how much they love the earth and the elements, etc. It’s called “Earth, Wind, Fire and Air”
Yeah, that’s the same element twice and totally ignores that water is a thing. There’s absolutely zero way any of their environment-loving honor-the-elements lyrics ever happened if three wiccans can’t even remember that water is an element. The Charmed ones would never do us like that if THEY formed a band; just sayin’.
BBC Radio 1 DJ Scott Mills asked his Twitter followers about song lyrics that never happened, and that was our first thought. Sure, he probably wasn’t referring to songs by fictional animated bands, but that line has bothered us for decades. DECADES. We’re not the only ones with lyrics that rub us the wrong way, though.
Here’s his original tweet.
Do you have any examples of lyrics in songs that clearly NEVER HAPPENED? Was Anne Marie really dancing on the hood in the middle of the woods of an old Mustang? Send me your lyrics that NEVER HAPPENED here 👇for todays show
— Scott Mills (@scott_mills) November 19, 2018
His followers chimed in with more than a thousand responses. People have apparently been mad about lyrics for AGES.
I’ve been part way across the desert on a horse with no name, most of the way across the desert with a horse called Gary, and then after checking properly, a horse named Gloria.
— Daniel Benneworth-Gray (@gray) November 19, 2018
If Lionel Richie had actually developed the gravity defying capacity for “Dancing on the Ceiling” pretty sure NASA would have been in touch
— Simon Caunt (@SimonCaunt2) November 19, 2018
Pretty sure Mariah Carey wants more for Christmas than a guy, can pretty much see the look of disappointment on her face when there’s a bloke under her tree and everyone else has gifts. Total lie.
— JRA27 (@JRA274) November 19, 2018
Surely not EVERYBODY was kung-fu fighting??
— Stuart Moore (@stuartmrswans) November 19, 2018
''Fifteen years old and smoking hand-rolled cigarettes
Running from the law through the backfields and getting drunk with my friends''
Yes Ed, I bet you did! 😂 pic.twitter.com/rK0KHDB63o
— Sam Kojczyk (@Sam_Kojak) November 19, 2018
I also call into question Bruno Mars exclamation that he would “catch a grenade for ya”. Other things Bruno Mars probably wouldn’t do for ya..
Throw his head on a blade for ya
jump in front of a train for ya
Take a bullet straight through his brain
And no, he wouldn’t die for you
— Brian Best (@Bestyboy1) November 19, 2018
Sadly even with climate change it has not
— Sue (@sue5728) November 19, 2018
On the subject of Elton, I am reasonably certain he is not and has never been an astronaut! #rocketmanisalie
— Rory O'Donnell (@RoryODed) November 19, 2018
I really doubt a girl ever walked up in the club wearing applebottom jeans, boots with the fur, baggy sweatpants, AND the Reeboks with the strap
But if she did, the whole place would indeed be looking at her
— Natalia (@nataliaels) November 19, 2018
Excuse me, but HER HIPS DON’T LIE…I can vouch for her that people don’t confuse her breast with mountains.
— 🎄3️⃣4️⃣🦌 (@MadebyNatalia) November 19, 2018
Bryan Adams, Summer of 69 is a lie…
Bryan would have been 9 years old in the summer of 69…
Somehow don't think he "had a job to do" or spent his evenings "down at the drive in"
And as for his friend Jody getting married at such a young age, I'm a little concerned
— Wilson! (@Ashley_Wilson96) November 19, 2018
I mean, I feel like of all the options given in this thread, this one might actually be the most plausible.
— Kathy Mair (@katilou10) November 19, 2018
I’m not so sure! I mean, he did think he was floating in a tin can which wouldn’t have gone down well with the NASA engineers 🙂
— Dave Hankin (@DavidHankin) November 19, 2018
— your unproblematic least fave (@BrittLovesLamp) November 19, 2018
I think some guilty feet DO have rhythm
— annalise davis (@annalise_davis) November 19, 2018
No one has a lovely bunch of coconuts. Coconuts do not come in bunches. "I've got a lovely bunch of bananas". I could buy that. I'm even willing to go with grapes. But coconuts? Nope.
— 🐱Michele🐱 (@michelegeluso) November 19, 2018
It’s statistically impossible that Bon Jovi saw a million faces and rocked 100% of them
— Robert S. Zimmerman (@Bobby_the_Z) November 19, 2018
Sorry isn't the hardest word. People have more trouble saying 'specific'
— Geords (@Geords1) November 19, 2018
While all of that is hilarious, the real gift that came of this thread is the sheer number of misheard lyrics. Some of them were simple, like people who didn’t know the lyric was “Like *I* blister in the sun” not “like *a* blister in the sun.” One, though, turned Adele into a horrific murderer.
We give you… Lorraine.
How’s Adele setting fire to the rain 🤔
— Rhys (@RRhys94) November 19, 2018
I thought it was Lorraine 🤦🏼♂️🙈😂
— Dave Harding (@WelshCobbler) November 19, 2018
Jesus, what's Lorraine done so wrong?? 😂😂
— Beth 💎 (@ElizabethL5192) November 19, 2018
Lorraine always be doing this
— XLCR.Tobes 🇳🇬🇬🇧 (@TobiAreje) November 19, 2018
We were told by Milli Vanilli to always blame it on Lorraine.
— pistrix (@pistrix) November 19, 2018
I guess Lorraine’s down in Africa
— Tim Owens (@thehobbymen) November 19, 2018
It was a quiche Lorraine. She forgot to set the oven timer.
— Mark Amft (@markamft) November 19, 2018
"Girl On Fire" is about Lorraine.
— Helen Woods (@MiniVanDents) November 19, 2018
I set fire to Lorraine. Watch her burn as I torch her face…
— Johnny Taylor ⚓🚢 (@the_able_seaman) November 19, 2018
Uhh ouch. Don’t light me on fire, I got enough to deal with.
— 🍁Lor🍁 (@Lorraen) November 19, 2018
Have another listen. The whole song is different and downright horrifying now. We love it.